Building Memory Lane

One day i’ll find a shy skramz girl to love. 

You were everything to me, you are everything to me,

and i’ll be ok and you’ll be ok too,

and one day we’ll see each other again and 

we will laugh

and you will thank me playfully for leaving

talking about your life and your great husband

and your kids,

you love your kids, you never wanted kids. 

and you’ll ask me where I’m going and ill

look down at my torn shoes and giggle while

trying to hold in a tear,

I’m dead.

And it was worth it, your smile was worth it. 

I’m tired of whores and idiots

people playing with me 

and cheating

in our games and 

being ass holes and

treating me like shit and

doing stuff behind my back. 

I’m just so tired of fake people, 

they all have god mentalities and

i’m just here waiting for an honest hug

or complement or even a 

nice word or two.

But they are liars and cheaters and

don’t give one shit about you, and

won’t even remember you next month

and will say they are there but they

are not,

they never where,

and a day after they’ll be with

someone else, fucking them.

I hate people so much, and I

haven’t had a good friend or companion in so 

long I”m starting to give up.

I hate you, and I will never come back. 

I hate you, I hope he doesen’t treat you right

and he cheats on you and fucks you and 

yells at you

and doesen’t listen to you, and

talks shit about you, 

and uses you,

and I hope that you give your heart to him

or to that other one and I hope with all I have

that they take your heart and step on it,

that you cry rivers and

that every guy,

every one of them,

treats you like a whore, because you are a 

dirty whore, and I hate you. 

Having a shitty night. 

Gonna curl up in a ball and look at lenses I can’t afford and wish for

everything to be over and be sad and eat left overs. Fuck everyone. 

that if i just disappeared no one would notice for a few weeks. 

I wake up, watch videos, go to work, come home, sleep. I can’t remember the last time I hung out with anyone. Can’t be too healthy to be this secluded. 

Not cool enough for the cool kids, too cool for the uncool kids. 

I will see you at the end of May. 

#YOLO #925REPREZZNT #CONCORDSWAG #CALIBOY

Quit school until I find something I really wanna do.

Starting P90X tomorrow again. 

Maybe moving back in with my parents, save up 

to travel and enjoy myself a bit. 

Gonna go hard on my writings and photography.

Official quit date for stoggies tomorrow. 

Going to look for a bike to use my car less. 

Hopefully better thing come.